Our pastor, preaching through the book of 1 Samuel and speaking on the realities of the challenges that King David faced, shared this quote from Paul Tripp early in the sermon. Tripp said, “God will take you where you haven’t intended to go in order to produce in you what you could not achieve on your own.” This quote struck me, and I carefully wrote it down in my notes.
That sermon was preached in May 2022.
The Lord called my daughter home the next month, in June 2022.
That morning, I thought how poignantly Tripp penned those words to describe the life that God calls some to. Just the summer before, I endured a relatively minor health issue coupled with some challenges our family faced that seemed relevant to the point the preacher was making. I had no clue how prophetic those words would truly end up being.
Losing a child is so far from the intentions you have as a parent raising your family. Those are roads you never want or mean to go on. And, when you do, producing fruit from such a season is the last thing on your mind.
If it wasn’t for the Lord and His nearness to us in those early days, I fear where I’d be now let alone experiencing the depths the Lord brought to my faith and trust in Him.
The next summer, one year after losing my daughter, I walked into the recovery room to see how my bride fared post-surgery due to cancer. Entering that room to see my darling bride hooked up to machines all over, struggling to even find a smidgen of rest overwhelmed me. Then came the recovery and ensuing radiation therapy that was nearly worse than the barbaric surgery.
A second bout of cancer for the bride I covenanted through sickness and health, all while still grieving the death of our youngest child, was not a place we intended to go.
None of this is new to any of you who read my earlier posts. And none may be surprised to hear that the Lord held us fast through it all. He surely produced fruit in us through it all. Not to say these experiences were not hard, they were very hard. Yet, our God has been good and kind and helpful through each and every step.
Where I’ve struggled lately, though, is with questions similar to several psalmists who said, “How long, O Lord?” Over the past four years, we’ve continued to endure hardship after hardship. Through these difficulties, I’ve grown…well, weary. I’m tired of facing hardship, of enduring difficulty. I look around (worse thing you can do), and I don’t see many others facing the same level of hard providences we do.
So, God…why? How much longer will you press us like this?
Enter the book of Hosea.
Recently, I led our young adult ministry through a teaching on the book of Hosea. In preparing for this, I was struck by the very first words God spoke to His prophet. It says in verse 2, “When the Lord first spoke through Hosea, the Lord said to Hosea, “Go, take to yourself a wife of whoredom and have children of whoredom, for the land commits great whoredom by forsaking the Lord.””
Not many of us look to marry someone we know will cheat on us, let alone marry a prostitute. Not many of us hope our spouse will cheat on us and possibly bring children into our homes from those other lovers. Yet, this was the life God called Hosea to.
God’s first words to His prophet, someone He loved and cared for, was to find a wife of whoredom who would bear children of whoredom to him. Prophets had it hard already, nobody in Israel liked seeing a prophet come to town. Why did God have to make it even harder on Hosea by not even allowing him peace in his home to come to at the end of a hard day at work?
God reminded me that He sometimes calls His loved ones to difficult lives.
Here’s the thing, though: I don’t have “rights” over my life…God has rights over me to do as He will.
I was bought with a price, and I even have said many times in the past that He may use me as He sees fit. So, if that is to endure difficulties in life for His glory, then who am I to complain?
God has a story to tell through His people. Hosea lived a tremendously difficult life because the Lord used him to illustrate a horrific truth about how His own people treat Him. But, also how He would nonetheless continue to pursue and love His bride.
God desires the same through you and me. I hope I can honor Him through this story…and, by His grace, He’ll help me endure. And, yes, these are not paths I would choose, but may I not forget Who it is that chose these paths for me.
The One who is all wise.
The One who is love.
The One who promised to bring me to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.
The One who purchased me and gave me life.
The One who is making me a home now, even as we speak.
I’m truly sorry if you find yourself in the midst of a difficult season of life. I know those roads are not easy, let alone roads you would not choose yourself. Yet, we don’t need to lose heart, “(f)or this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison.” (2 Cor 4:17) For now, let us walk these unintended paths following the examples of saints like Hosea before us, waiting and hoping for the production we could not achieve on our own…
Till we are home…
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